Beef Ban, but what about us?

By Mayur Lookhar

Sunoh Sunoh aey gaon walon,
Aaj ki taaza khabar! Aaj ki taaza khabar

Maharashtra ke wazir-e-alam ne kiya hai elaan
Ke ab gau mata pe nahi chalegi koi aari
Katey jayengey har haath
Jisne kabhi maiyyan ki gardan pe aari daali

Na hoga koi bacchda yateem
Na koi mata khoyegi apni aulaad

cow

Ab yeh khabar toh aag ki tarha failee
Gau mata aur usske bacchdey khushi se sama na paye
“Dev-Indra ji, shukriya meherbaani
Jo aapne samjhi bezubaan ki zubaani”

Zahir hai, gau aur uska parivaar toh ab hai mehfuz
Par ye kya, kyun khet me jami pashu pakshiyon ki bheed
Khade hai yahan murgi, bhains, kukur, suri aur bakri

Boli bhains khushi say,

asiatic_water_buffalo
“Ari o saheliyon, main toh khushi se hui paani paani
Ab nahi chalegi kisi kasai ki manmaani”

Tabhi aayi gau mata aur boli
“Ari O murkh, kya teri akal ghaas khane gayi?
Rihahi hame mili hai, tujhe nahi O kaali”
Tu toh gayi bhains paani main”

Chehre se muskaan gayab, ghabrayi bhains boli,
“Are Dev Indra ji, hum kale hai toh kya hua dilwale hai
Yeh kaisa bhed? Jahan gau ko mili rahat
Par hame sazaye kaala paani”

“KHAMOSH” gurr raya suri

pig

“What the shit is this?
Gau ko diya darza mata ka
Par hamein toh karaar diya ek bimari (Swine flu)
Miyan toh humpar thukay,
Aur Padri karey hamare tukdey
Yeh kaisi na insaafi, gau ko mili rahat
Par hame sazaye kaala paani”

“Chup kar ae budbak,”
(Ab sunoh is murgi ki zubaani)

angry chicken

“Itihaas gawah hai ki is dharti par
Sabse zyada lahoo kisi ka baha hai, toh wah hamri kom ka
Kabhi tandoor, kabhi tawa toh kabhi kadai
Aisa koi din nahi, jahan apno ki gardan na hai kati

Is insaan ne toh aise keher hai machayi
Ke ab toh hum paida bhi iski marzi se hote hain
Yeh kaisi na insaafi, jahan gau ko mili hai rahat
Par hame toh sazaye kaala pani”

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Pic courtesy: DREAMSTIME.COM
Mai.! Maiii!. Arey bhai koi is bechari bakri ki bhi sunloh
“Aye murgi, tera toh jeevan hi hai ek abhishaap
Kahe log tujhe pakshi, par tere par hai kahan?
Par, par koi hame samjhaye,
kyun kisi ko luft, mere rakht ki?

Halaal hui kasai ke haathon
Bani Nawabon ke thali ki lazeez shaan
Har Rozedaar ki main qurbani

Yeh kaisi insaafi Dev-Indra, gusthakhi maaf
Yeh kaisi insaafi Wazir-e-alam
Ke gau ko mili hai rahat
Par hame sazaye kala paani

Bhau bhau, tabhi bhauk utha kukur
Par naraaz murgi boli,
“Ae kuttey, toh kyun bhauk raha hai?
Yeh insaan toh HOT DOG ke naam par
Hame bali ka bakra banatey hai
Tujhe kahe ka darr,
joh aa gaya yahan magarmach ke asoon bahane”

dog

Bechara Moti bola, “Ae Murgi,
is galat fami na raho ke hum hai mehfuz
Jaise hot dog ke naam par tum kati jaati ho
Waisi hi tumhre naam pe hamein kata jaata hai kuch Chinese hotel main”
Arey yeh kya, paani main machi hulchul
Dekho zara yeh toh macchli asoon baha rahi hai

angry fish

“Murgi, kukur, suri aur bakri
Is jal main koi aisa bhed nahin
Yahan toh har jeevit machware ke jaal se nahi bachta
Ab toh Ganga maiyyan bhi hame nahi bacha payi
Khauf hai hame itna, ke ab mann kahe
GET ME OUT OF HERE!”

Sabhi pashu pakshi ek awaaz main boley
Hum sabhi theray manushya ke haathon ki katputli
Jiska jo mann kiya, waisa suloop kiya
Par ae manushya, kabhi socha tuney,
Hum toh marke bhi tere kaam aaye,
Par tune zinda rehkar hame kya diya?

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